Easter Humor

Q: Why shouldn't you make jokes about Jesus on Easter?
A: He's not the kind of guy you'd want to cross.

Bumper Stickers

• Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don't.
• I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe.
• He's not dead, he's electroencephalographically challenged.
• She's always late. Her ancestors arrived on the Juneflower.
• You have the right to remain silent.... Anything you say will be misquoted, then used against you.
• I wonder how much deeper the ocean would be without sponges.
• Honk if you love peace and quiet.
• Nothing is fool-proof to a sufficiently talented fool.
• A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.
• Atheism is a non-prophet organization.

Moses Goes to the Doctor

Moses goes to the doctor and says, "Doc, as you know I'm an avid hiker, but lately I can't climb a mountain without getting terrible stomach cramps and gas.  Do you have anything that can make my trip more pleasant?"
The doctor said, "Here, take these two tablets, just try not to break them."