Redneck Disease

A redneck visits the doctor and says, "I have seenus disease." The doctor said, "You mean sinus disease." The man said, "No, I was in bed with my girlfriend and my wife seen us."

Saving the Situation

After attending a party for his boss, the life of the party was nursing a king-size hangover and asked his wife, "What the hell happened?" "As usual, you made an ass of yourself in front of your boss," replied the wife. "Piss on him," answered the husband. "You did," said the wife, "and he fired you." "Well, fuck him," said the husband. "I did, and you go back to work in the morning."

Take her apart!

A young boy asked his mother "Ma, is it true that people can be taken apart like machines?" "Of course not, where did you hear such nonsense?" replied by his mother The young boy answered "The other day, Daddy was talking to someone on the phone, and he said that he screwed the ass off his secretary."