For All My People

On the roof of a very tall building are four men; one is asian, one is mexican, one is black, and the last one is white. The asian walks to the ledge and says, "This is for all my people" and jumps off the roof. Next, the mexican walks to the ledge and also says, "This is for all my people" and then he jumps off the roof. Next is the black guy's turn. The black guy walks to the ledge and says, "This is for all my people" and then throws the white guy off the roof.

Denzel

I met Denzel Washington once.
I kept yelling, "Hey, Denzel," and he kept saying, "I'm not Denzel, you fucking racist!" Oh man, classic Denzel.

Piano Uncle

My uncle was a racist piano player, all his work sounded awful because he skipped all the black keys.