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The best jokes and joke writers!

Phone Call

"Hi Mom, it's me." "Hi Sally, are you okay? I thought you were with your father at the hardware store, looking for a drill." "Yeah, I was, but I got arrested and they've let me make one phone call, and that's why I'm calling you." "Oh my God, what happened?"

"Oh, I punched this African-American woman in the face." "What on earth . . . Why did you do that?"

"Well, it really wasn't my fault. Dad told me to find a Black and Decker. Mom, I knocked the shit out of her!"

Floating Television

Q: What do you say when you see your television floating at night?

A: "Drop it nigga."

Asian Pet Store

Q: What's the problem with an Asian pet store?

A: There's always a kitchen in the back!

Truck Ride

Q: A Mexican, Guatemalan and Cuban guy are riding in a truck. Who's driving?

A: ICE.

How Many Cops?

Q: How many cops does it take to change a light bulb?

A: One, unless it's a black bulb, then he'll call for backup!