Sergeants and Tigers

Q: How are tigers like sargeants in the army?
A: They both wear stripes!

Trees in Paris

Q: Why are there so many trees along the streets of Paris?
A: So the Germans can march in the shade.

Redneck One Liners Continued

You might be a redneck if...

• More than one living relative is named after a Southern Civil War general.
• You think the stock market has a fence around it.
• You think the O.J. trial was the big Sunkist and Minutemaid taste test.
• You've ever lost a loved one to kudzu.
• Your boat has not left the driveway in 15 years.
• Your front porch collapses and kills more than three dogs.
• Your coffee table used to be a telephone cable spool.
• You keep a can of Raid on the kitchen table.
• You've ever used a toilet seat as a picture frame.
• Your home has more miles on it than your car.