Fighter Pilot

Last Thursday night he gradually woke up - stiff as a plank in a hospital's ICU.
Tubes up his nose and down his throat; wires monitoring every function and all around his head, hell of a pain over his left ear . . .and a Drop Dead Gorgeous Nurse hovering over him.
It was obvious he'd been in a serious accident. She looked deep and steady into his eyes, and he heard her slowly say,
"You may not feel anything from the waist down . . . "He managed to mumble in reply, "Can I feel your boobs, then?"

Sniper Dude

Q: What do you call a communist sniper?
A: A Marxman.

Clinton Strikes Again

The Secret Service got a real scare the other day when someone threw a beer at Bill Clinton during his morning jog.
Fortunately, it was a draft, so he was able to dodge it.