Mommy's Little Helper

Little Susie was Mommy's helper. She helped set the table when company was due for dinner. Soon, everything was on, Mr. Smythe the guest came in, and everyone sat down. Then Mother noticed something was missing.... "Susie, dear," she said, "You didn't put a knife and fork at Mr. Smythe's place." "But, Mommy, I thought he wouldn't need them," explained Susie. "Daddy says he always eats like a horse!"

A Jew and a Canoe

Q: What is the difference between a jew and a canoe?
A: A canoe tips

How Do You Know When Your Girlfriend Is Too Fat?

Q: How do you know when your girlfriend is too fat?
A: When she sits on your face and you can't hear the stereo