Sex While Pregnant

For those of you about to become first-time fathers, you should know something that us old pros do: there are three stages of sex with your mate during pregnancy.

1. During the first trimester, you do it regular style.
2. During the second trimester, you do it doggie style.
3. During the last trimester, you do it wolf style. "What the heck is wolf style?" you ask. That's when you sit by the hole and howl!

Pregnant Polish Girl

Q: What did the Polish mother say when her daughter announced that she was pregnant?
A: "Are you sure it's yours?"

5 Months Pregnant

Q: My wife is five months pregnant and so moody that sometimes she's borderline irrational.
A:  So what's your question, dork?