Dark Humor Jokes - Death Jokes

Bad and Worse News

A man visits the doctor for a checkup, and after some tests, the doctor comes in with a grave look on his face.
Doctor: "Well, I have some bad news and some really bad news."
Man: "Well, give me the really bad news first."
Doctor: "You have cancer, and only 6 months to live."
Man: "And the bad news?"
Doctor: "You have Alzheimer's disease."
Man: "That's great. I was afraid I had cancer!"

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Anonymous

Motorcycle Crash

I looked out of my window in horror yesterday as a crowd gathered around a crashed motorcyclist. I rushed outside yelling, "Let me through, let me through" A man at the front said, "Thank God for that, are you a Doctor"?
I said "No, that's my fucking Pizza"

Anonymous

Cowboy Die With Boots On

Q: Why did the cowboy die with his boots on?
A: Because he didn't want to stub his toe when he kicked the bucket!

Anonymous