Visiting Grandma

Mommy, mommy, I don't want to visit grandma today! "Shut up and keep digging, boy."

Shrimp in a Dead Woman

There were these two guys working late in a morgue, when one guy said, "Hey man there is a woman in there with a shrimp in her vagina!" The other asked, "What is a shrimp doing a dead woman's vagina? Let me go see." Both of them went in the room with the woman, and they both curiously looked. Finally, the second man said, "You idiot, this ain't no shrimp it's a clitoris." And the other man replied, "Well, it tasted like shrimp to me."

Elton John vs Princess Diana

Q: What's the difference between Elton John and Princess Diana?
A: One's composing, the other is decomposing.