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The best jokes and joke writers!

Drinking Code

A blonde, a brunette and a redhead walked into a bar.

The brunette said to the bartender "I'll have a B and C."

"What's a B and C?" asked the bartender.

"Bourbon and Coke," replied the brunette.

"I'll have a G and T," said the red head.

"What's a G and T?" asked the bartender.

"Gin and tonic." replied the red head.

"I'll have a15," said the blonde.

"What's a 15?" asked the bartender.

The blonde rolled her eyes and said,"Duh, a 7 and 7."

Going to Jamaica

A blonde gets on an airplane and sits down in the first class section. The flight attendant tells her she must move to coach because she doesn't have a first class ticket. The blonde replies, "I'm blonde, I'm smart and I have a good job. I'm staying in first class until we reach Jamaica." The flight attendant gets the head flight attendant who asks the woman to leave and she says, "I'm blonde, I'm smart, and I have a good job. I'm staying in first class until we reach Jamaica." The flight attendant doesn't know what to do because they have to get the rest of the passengers seated to take off, so they get the copilot. The copilot goes up to the blonde and whispers in her ear. She immediately gets up and goes to her seat in the coach section. The head flight attendant asks the copilot what he said to get her to move. The copilot replies, "I told her the front half of the airplane wasn't going to Jamaica."

Blonde Playing Trivia Pursuit

A blonde was playing Trivia Pursuit and was asked, "if she was in a vacuum and someone called out her name, would she hear it?"   She thought and thought, then finally answered.. "is it on or off?"

The Blonde and the Pig

A man walks by a blonde, who is holding a pig. The man asks, "Where did you get her?" The pig answered, "I won her at the fair."

Blind Man

A blonde girl just stepped into the bathtub when the doorbell rang. "Who is it?" "Blind man," came the response. Feeling charitable, the blonde dashed from the tub without bothering to put on any clothes, grabbed her purse, and opened the door. The man's jaw dropped and he stammered, "Wh-where do you want me to put these blinds, lady?"