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The best jokes and joke writers!

Mailman Christmas

I'm a mailman. At Christmas this year, blonde Mrs. Jankowitz met me at the door and invited me in for a great breakfast spread. After I ate, I thanked her and she said, "There's more." She took me to her bedroom and showed me moves I had never imagined. I told her I had no idea she felt this way. She said, "I don't." I ask, "So what was all this about?" She says, "I asked the husband what to give the mailman." He said, "Screw the mailman! Breakfast was my idea."

Drinking Code

A blonde, a brunette and a redhead walked into a bar.

The brunette said to the bartender "I'll have a B and C."

"What's a B and C?" asked the bartender.

"Bourbon and Coke," replied the brunette.

"I'll have a G and T," said the red head.

"What's a G and T?" asked the bartender.

"Gin and tonic." replied the red head.

"I'll have a15," said the blonde.

"What's a 15?" asked the bartender.

The blonde rolled her eyes and said,"Duh, a 7 and 7."

Blonde Played Hockey

Q: How did the blonde break her leg playing hockey with the Toronto Maple Leafs?

A: She fell out of the tree.

Going to Jamaica

A blonde gets on an airplane and sits down in the first class section. The flight attendant tells her she must move to coach because she doesn't have a first class ticket. The blonde replies, "I'm blonde, I'm smart and I have a good job. I'm staying in first class until we reach Jamaica." The flight attendant gets the head flight attendant who asks the woman to leave and she says, "I'm blonde, I'm smart, and I have a good job. I'm staying in first class until we reach Jamaica." The flight attendant doesn't know what to do because they have to get the rest of the passengers seated to take off, so they get the copilot. The copilot goes up to the blonde and whispers in her ear. She immediately gets up and goes to her seat in the coach section. The head flight attendant asks the copilot what he said to get her to move. The copilot replies, "I told her the front half of the airplane wasn't going to Jamaica."

Blonde Playing Trivia Pursuit

A blonde was playing Trivia Pursuit and was asked, "if she was in a vacuum and someone called out her name, would she hear it?"   She thought and thought, then finally answered.. "is it on or off?"