A Beer And One

A guy walks into a bar with a piece of asphalt under his arm. He asks the bartender for a beer, and one for the road.

Who Needs Women?

A man walks into the bar and orders two shots of whiskey, drinks one, and pours the other shot in his hand. He does this 3 times before the bartender finally asks him, "Why is it you drink one shot and pour the other in your hand." The man replies, "I'm getting my girl friend drunk!"

Priest, Rabbi, and Dwarf Walk into a Bar

A priest, a rabbi, and a dwarf walk into a bar.  The bartender says, "What is this, some kind of a joke?!"