Trumpets and Guns
In a small town, a man opened a small store selling trumpets and guns.
One day his neighbor pays him a visit and says, "So how is your strange business going?" "What do you mean strange?" "Because you sell only trumpets and guns!" "So?" "Well, let me put it this way, what do you sell the most, trumpets or guns?"
"It evens itself out. Each time a customer buys a trumpet, one of his neighbors buys a gun."
Just Fake It
A violist and a cellist were standing on a sinking ship together. "Help!" cried the cellist, "I can't swim!" "Don't worry," said the violist, "just fake it."
Q: How do you get two bagpipes to play a perfect unison?
A: Shoot one.
Q: What type of music do sad ghosts play on the harmonica?
A: Moody Boos