Q: How do know a clarinet player is playing loud?
A: You can almost hear them.
Q: What's the definition of a nerd?
A: Someone who has his or her own alto clarinet.
Q: What's the definition of a gentleman?
A: One who knows how to play the saxophone, but doesn't!
Saved By The Ship
Q: Limp Bizkit and Dennis Rodman are on a sinking ship. Who gets saved?
A: The music world and the NBA...
Clarinet and Onion
Q: What is the difference between a clarinet and an onion?
A: Nobody cries when you chop an clarinet into little pieces.