Profession Jokes - Teacher Jokes
A Lecture about English
A linguistics professor was lecturing to his English class one day. "In English," he said, "A double negative forms a positive. In some languages, though, such as Russian, a double negative is still a negative. However, there is no language wherein a double positive can form a negative." A voice from the back of the room piped up, "Yeah, right."
Quite the Good Guess
The teacher noticed that Al had been daydreaming for a long time. She decided to get his attention. " Al," she said, "If the world is 25,000 miles around and eggs are sixty cents a dozen, how old am I? " Thirty-four," Al answered unhesitatingly. The teacher replied, "Well, that's not far from my actual age. Tell me... how did you guess?" "Oh, there's nothing to it," Al said. "My big sister is seventeen and she's only half-crazy."
Old mathematicians never die, they just disintegrate
Old Math Teachers
Old math teachers never die, they just reduce to lowest term.
I'm dating an English teacher who keeps correcting my grammar during sex.
She gets particularly annoyed about my improper use of the colon.