Practice makes Perfect

My Lesbian neighbors Jill and Julie, who are both teachers, asked me to help them conceive a child.
They said they wouldn't mind if we did it the old-fashioned way as they weren't man-haters.
For six months now we've been trying but I just don't have the heart to tell them that I had a vasectomy last year.

Homework

Q: Why did the student eat her homework?
A: Because the teacher said it would be a 'piece of cake'.

Fair Punishment

Boy: Will you punish me for something I didn't do?
Teacher: Of course not!
Boy: Good, cause I didn't do my homework!