Bun Twitch

An obese woman goes to a doctor to be put on a drastic weight-loss program. The doctor tells her that she can eat anything she likes but that any food must be inserted up the anus. The woman agrees and four weeks later comes back for a check-up. The doctor is very pleased with the woman’s progress but is concerned that the woman’s hips keep twitching constantly. 
“When did that hip twitching start?” asks the doctor. “That's not twitching,” replies the woman. “I’m chewing gum.”

Intensive Care Phenomenon

There was this case in the hospital's Intensive Care ward where patients always died in the same bed, on Sunday morning at 2 AM, regardless of their medical condition.
This puzzled the doctors and some even thought that it had something to do with the supernatural. Why the death? So the doctors decide to go down to the ward to investigate the cause of the incidents. So on the next Sunday morning few minutes before 2 AM, all doctors and nurses nervously wait outside the ward to see for themselves what the terrible phenomenon was all about. Some were holding wooden crosses, prayer books and other holy objects to ward off the evil. Just when the clock struck 2... Jimmy O'Leary, the part-time Sunday sweeper, entered the ward and unplugged the life support system so that he could use the vacuum cleaner.

Strawberry and Cream

A man walks into his doctor's office and whines, "Doc, you've got to help me; I've got a strawberry stuck up my ass."
The doctor pulls out his prescription pad and says, "I've got cream for that!"