Plumbing

A pipe burst in a doctor's house. He called a plumber. The plumber arrived, unpacked his tools, did mysterious plumber-type things for a while, and handed the doctor a bill for $600. The doctor exclaimed, "This is ridiculous! I don't even make that much as a doctor..." The plumber waited for him to finish his ranting, then replied... "Neither did I when I was a doctor!"

Doctor

Q: "What do you want to be when you grow up?"
A: "A doctor."
Q: "And why's that?"
A: "Because it's the only profession where you can tell women to take off their clothes and then stick their husbands with the bill."

National Pastime

Show me a man that thinks baseball is the national pastime and I'll show you a man who never played doctor when he was a kid!