Wrong Operation

One Polish surgeon asks another: "How did that appendectomy go?" "Appendectomy?" shrieks the other. "I though it was an autopsy!"

Stinky Woman

Mary went to the doctor complaining of body odor. "Do you wash?" the doctor asked the smelly young girl. "Oh, yes," Mary answered. "Each morning, I start at my head and wash down as far as possible. Then I start at my feet and I wash up as far as possible." "Well," the doctor concluded, "Go home and wash 'possible'!"

Little Prick

I was pruning roses when I hurt myself. I called my doctor for advice, but they called me a pervert and hung up on me as soon as I told them I had a prick in my hand.