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Profession Jokes
Try to Catch the Rabbit
The Los Angeles Police Department (LAPD), The FBI, and the CIA are all trying to prove that they are the best at apprehending criminals. The President decides to give them a test. He releases a rabbit into a forest and each of them has to catch it. The CIA goes in. They place animal informants throughout the forest. They question all plant and mineral witnesses. After three months of extensive investigations they conclude that rabbits do not exist. The FBI goes in. After two weeks with no leads they burn the forest, killing everything in it, including the rabbit, and they make no apologies. The rabbit had it coming. The LAPD goes in. They come out two hours later with a badly beaten bear. The bear is yelling, "Okay! Okay! I'm a rabbit! I'm a rabbit!"
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Taxonomy of Medical Practitioners
An Acher of bacteriologists
A murmur of cardiologists
A stain of cytotechnologists
A rash of dermatologists
A speck of forensic pathologists
A poke of gynecologists
A vessel of heart surgeons
A clot of hematologists
A nursery of obstetricians
A dose of pharmacists
A pile of proctologists
A G-spot of sex therapists
A stream of urologists
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New Experience
There was a horrible mistake at the hospital. A man who was scheduled for a vasectomy was instead given a sex change operation. The doctors gathered at his bed afterwards to tell him the bad news. "Ohhhh no!!!" the patient wailed, "I'll never be able to experience an erection again!" "Of course you'll still be able to experience erections," replied one surgeon, "only it will have to be someone else's!"
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