U.S. State Jokes

Unusual State Laws

It is illegal for a man to shoot off a gun when his female partner has an orgasm.
Connorsville, Wisconsin
It is illegal for husbands to curse during sex.
Willowdale, Oregon
It is punishable by law to make love while hunting or fishing on your wedding day.
Oblong, Illinois
(Editor's note: Trust me if a man takes his wife fishing on their wedding day, he has an even bigger problem.)
No man is allowed to make love with the smell of garlic, onions, or sardines on his breath.
Alexandria, Minnesota

A man cannot have more than three gulps of beer while lying in bed with his wife, girlfriend, or significant other--- or holding her in his arms.
Ames, Iowa
There is a law banning all sexual activity between members of the opposite sex in the front yard of a home after sundown -- if they are nude.
Bozeman, Montana

An ordinance specifically bans couples from having sex while standing inside a store's walk-in-meat freezer.
Newcastle, Wyoming

A state law mandates that all bachelors should be called "master," not "mister," when addressed by their female counterparts.
Illinois

Women are prohibited from wearing corsets because the "privilege of admiring the curvaceous, unencumbered body of a young woman should not be denied to the normal, red-blooded American male."
Merryville, Missouri
(Editor's note: This one either makes me want to stand up and scream, "Hallelujah!" or puke.)
Law mandates that a woman can't dance on a table in a saloon or bar unless she has on at least three pounds, two ounces of clothing.
Helena, Montana

It's legal for couples to have sex in a parked vehicle during their lunch break, as long as the vehicle has curtains drawn to discourage peeping Toms.
Carlsbad, New Mexico

State law says that if you are a single, divorced, or widowed woman, you can not parachute on Sunday afternoons.
Florida

Woman aren't allowed to wear patent-leather shoes. A man might see the reflection of something "he oughtn't."
Cleveland, Ohio

No woman may have sex with a man while riding in an ambulance. If caught, the woman can be charged with a sexual misdemeanor and "her name is to be published in the local newspaper." The man isn't charged nor is his name revealed.
Tremont, Utah

Categories: Political Jokes , U.S. State Jokes
Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

West Virginia Romance

The West Virginian and his gal were embracing passionately in the front seat of the car. "Want to go in the back seat?" she asked. "No," he replied. A few minutes later she asked, "Now do you want to get in the back seat?" "No," he said again, "I wanna stay here in the front seat with you."

Categories: U.S. State Jokes (West Virginia Jokes) , Insult Jokes (Stupid Insults) , Funny Thoughts (Stupid Insults) , Relationship Jokes (Dating Jokes)
Anonymous

Dallas Public Schools

True story. Sunday, November 29, 1992 An investigation by the Dallas Morning News revealed the city's public schools employ at least 185 people who have been convicted of felonies, including two convicted murderers. In response, the school superintendent promised that the city would begin periodic records checks.

Categories: U.S. State Jokes (Texas Jokes) , School Jokes , Profession Jokes (Bureaucrat Jokes)
Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous