Buy Alligator Shoes

A man was on holiday in the depths of Louisiana, where he tried to buy some Alligator shoes. However, he was not prepared to pay the high prices, and after having failed to haggle the vendor down to a reasonable price level, ended up shouting "I don't give two hoots for your shoes man, I'll go and kill my own "croc!," to which the shopkeeper replied, "by all means, just watch out for those two "ole boys" who are doing the same!" So the man went out into the Bayou, and after a while saw two men with spears, standing still in the water. 'They must be the 'ole boys' he thought. Just at that point he noticed an alligator moving in the water towards one of them. The guy stood completely passive, even as the gator came ever closer. Just as the beast was about to swallow the him, he struck home with his spear and wrestled the gator up onto the beach, where several were already laying. Together, the two guys threw the gator onto its back, where-upon one exclaimed "Darn! This one doesn't have any shoes either!"
 

New Factory

The president of ABC decided that it was time to build a new factory. He asked representatives from three development companies to come in and make a bid on the project. The three companies showed up at the scheduled meeting. The president of ABC asked the first company, Bruin Construction, whose president earned his MBA from UCLA, " How much will your company charge for this project?"
"2 million," said Bruin. "1 million for materials and 1 million for labor."
Then president then asks the same question to the second company, Cardinal Construction, whose president earned his MBA from Stanford. Cardinal answered, "3 million, 1.5 million for materials, 1.3 million for labor, and 0.2 million for licenses and permits."
Finally, the president asks the last company , Trojan Construction, whose president earned his MBA from USC. Trojan answered, " 4 million."
"FOUR MILLION," yelled the president of ABC. "How do you breakdown the cost?"
Trojan replied, "1 million for you, 1 million for me, and 2 million to get the guy from UCLA to build the factory!

Kansas Crazy Law

• If two trains meet on the same track, neither shall proceed until the other has passed.
• The state game rule prohibits the use of mules to hunt ducks.
• Rabbits may not be shot from motorboats.
• No one may catch fish with his bare hands.
• Pedestrians crossing the highways at night must wear tail lights.
• It is illegal to spit on a sidewalk.
• All places of business must provide a horse water troft
• No one may wear a bee in their hat.
• All cars entering the city limits must first sound their horn to warn the horses of their arrival.
• Musical car horns are banned
• It is against the law to leave your car running unattended.
• The installation of bathtubs is prohibited.
• Any person caught using or carrying bean snappers or the like shall upon conviction, be fined. -City ordinance 349 of Wichita, Kansas.
• Before proceeding through the interesection of Douglas and Broadway, a motorist is required to get out of their vehice and fire three shot gun rounds into the air.