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The best jokes and joke writers!

Californians to Change Lightbulb 2

Q: How many Californians does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

A: Five - one to screw it in and four to sit in the hot tub and discuss the environmental impact.

Smog Out

Q: What happens when the smog lifts in Los Angeles?

A: U.C.L.A.

Deer Hunters in L.A.

Q: Where in L.A. can a deer hunter find does in season year round?

A: Venison Beach

Just In Time

A long time resident of San Francisco is packing all his stuff into boxes. His roommate comes in & asks what he's doing. "I'm leaving !" he replies. "They just made homosexuality legal." "So why leave now ?" queries his roomie. "Gays have been part of the scene here for years and years." "Yeah, I know." he replied. "I'm getting the hell out of here before the damn fools make it compulsory."

Alien Laws

A Californian and an Texan were deer hunting in the brush of south Texas when an illegal alien runs across a clearing. The Texan takes careful aim, shoots and kills him. "You can't do that!" cried the Californian. "It's legal here in Texas " replies the Texan.

Later that night the Californian goes to town to buy some beer from Walmart. He puts the beer on the roof of his truck and while he's making room behind the seat, an illegal alien runs by, grabs the beer and runs away. The Californian draws his pistol, shoots and kills him. As he is retrieving his beer the police come and arrest him.

"But I thought it was legal to shoot illegal aliens here in Texas!" protests the Californian. "Well, yeah," says the cop, "but you can't use bait."