NEWS FLASH: Terrorists...
Latest news reports advise that a cell of 4 terrorists has been operating in one of the neighborhoods in Detroit, MI. Police advised earlier today that 3 of the 4 have been detained. Police Officials have detained the following terrorists on civil unrest issues:
1: Bin Sleepin
2: Bin Drinkin
3: Bin Fightin
The Police advise further that they can find no one fitting the description of the fourth cell member, Bin Workin, anywhere in the neighborhood. Police are very confident that anyone who looks like Bin Workin will be very easy to spot in the community. No further information available.
Saddam Drinking Out
Q: Why doesn't Saddam go out drinking?
A: Why should he when he can get bombed at home?
Q: Where do suicide bombers go after they die?
Q: Why aren't there any Walmart's in Afghanistan?
A: Because there are too many Targets.
Top 10 Things Bowe Bergdahl Learned from the Taliban
10. It’s normal to own a $3,000 machine gun and $5,000 rocket launcher, but you can't afford shoes.
9. Most of his Taliban friends have more wives than teeth.
8. You wipe your butt with your bare left hand, but consider bacon 'unclean.'
7. You believe vests come in two styles: bullet-proof and suicide.
6. If you don’t like what someone else is doing, you simply declare Jihad against them.
5. You believe television is dangerous, but routinely carry explosives in your clothing.
4. You forget that cell phones have uses other than setting off roadside bombs.
3. You often utter the phrase, 'I love what you've done with your cave.'
2. You bathe at least monthly whether necessary or not.
1. It’s not unusual to have a crush on your neighbor's goat.