U.S. State Jokes - Alaska Jokes
Three Eskimos in Alaska
There were three Eskimos in Alaska, and one time while they were at their local bar, they got to talking about how cold it was outside, and how cold their igloos were. They could agree on everything but whose igloo was the coldest, so they decided to determine who, indeed, had the coldest igloo. They went to the first Eskimo's igloo, where he said, "Watch this!" and poured a cup of water into the air. Well, the water froze in mid-air and fell onto the floor solid. "Not bad," said the other Eskimos, but each maintained their igloo was colder still. So they went to the second Eskimo's igloo, and he said "Watch this!" and took a big breath and exhaled, whereupon his breath froze into a big lump and fell to the floor. "Wow, that's colder than mine!" said the first Eskimo. But the third Eskimo exclaimed his was colder still. So they ended up at the third Eskimo's igloo. He said, "Watch this!" and went into the bedroom, looked under three huge thick furs, and retrieved one of several small balls of ice there. He took one of the small balls of ice and put it in a spoon, and held a match under it. When it heated up enough, it went "FFFAAAARRRRTTT". He won.
Cold Cream
Q: What do you get from an Alaskan cow?
A: Cold cream!
Eskimos on the Toilet
Q: What do Eskimos get from sitting on the toilet too long?
A: Polaroids!
Alaska Crazy Law
In Fairbanks it is considered an offense to feed alcoholic beverages to a moose. While it is legal to shoot bears, waking a sleeping bear for the purpose of taking a photograph is prohibited. It is considered an offense to push a live moose out of a moving airplane. It is the state policy that emergencies are held to a minimum and are rarely found to exist. -Sec. 44.62.270.
Drunk Alaskan Ice Fishing
A drunk guy in Alaska decides to go ice fishing. He starts sawing a hole in the ice, when a loud booming voice says, "You will find no fish there." The drunk looks up, ignores it, and continues on. The voice booms again, "You will find no fish under the ice." The drunk looks up and says, "God, is that you?" The voice says, "No, I'm the manager of this ice rink."
