Sports Jokes - Soccer / Football Jokes

Toe Poke

How would you feel about a toe poke? Goooaaalll!

Anonymous

Substance on the Field

The England team's training session was delayed on Wednesday for nearly two hours at Twickenham. One of the players, while on his way back to the dressing room happened to look down and notice a suspicious looking, unknown white powdery substance at the end of the field. Coach Clive Woodward immediately suspended practice while the Police were called in to investigate. After a complete field analysis, the Police determined that the white substance, unknown to the players, was the try line. Practice was resumed when the officials decided that it was unlikely that the team would encounter the substance again.

Anonymous

Sideline Coach

A junior soccer team is playing a match one Sunday. Just before the kick-off the team coach approaches one of his young players. “Do you understand that you mustn’t swear at the ref if he gives you a card and you mustn’t attack an opponent if he fouls you?” “Yes,” replies the boy. “Good,” says the coach. “Now go and explain that to your mother.”

Anonymous