Church Sunday

Two Men were leaving church on a bright Sunday morning. "You know," said the first friend, "I can always tell who the golfers are in church." "How's that?" asked his friend. "It's easy," he said. "Just look at who is praying with an interlocking grip."

Saturday Routine

Every Saturday morning he has an early tee time. He gets up early and eager, golfs all day long, sometimes 36 holes. Well, one Saturday morning he gets up early, dresses quietly, gets his clubs out of the closet and goes to his car to drive to the course. Coming out of his garage rain is pouring down - torrential downpour. There is snow mixed in with the rain, and the wind is blowing 50 mph. He returns to the garage. He comes back into the house and turns the TV to the weather channel. He finds it's going to be bad weather all day long, so he puts his clubs back into the closet, quietly undresses and slips back into bed. There he cuddles up to his wife's back, now with a different anticipation, and whispers, "The weather out there is terrible." To which she sleepily replies, "Can you believe my stupid husband is out golfing in that crap?"

Tiger Drives

The worst part about Tiger Wood's driving
is that it's probably going to add to his handicap.