49ers New Recruits
Q: Why did the 49ers hire two nuns and a prostitute?
A: They wanted two tight ends and a wide receiver.
Do you know why the Cincinnati Bengals were the last NFL team to get a website? Because they couldn't put three W's in a row.
Last Ditch Effort
Two football players were taking an important final exam. If they failed, they would be on academic probation and not allowed to play in the Sugar Bowl the following week. The exam was fill-in-the-blank. The last question read, "Old MacDonald had a _________." Bubba was stumped. He had no idea of the answer. He knew he needed to get this one right to be sure he passed. Making sure the professor wasn't watching, he tapped Tiny on the shoulder. "Pssst. Tiny. What's the answer to the last question?" Tiny laughed. He looked around to make sure the professor hadn't noticed then he turned to Bubba. "Bubba, you're so stupid. Everyone knows Old MacDonald had a farm." "Oh yeah," said Bubba. "I remember now." He picked up his No. 2 pencil and started to write the answer in the blank. He stopped. Reaching to tap Tiny's shoulder again, he whispered, "Tiny, how do you spell farm?" "You are really dumb, Bubba. That's so easy. Farm is spelled E-I-E-I-O."
Q: What does an Oregon Ducks fan do when his team has won the national championship?
A: He turns off the PlayStation 3.
Q: How do the Dallas Cowboys spend their first week at spring training?
A: Studying their Miranda Rights.