Tennis Ball

While out one morning in the park, a jogger found a brand new tennis ball. Seeing no one around that it might belong to, he slipped it into the pocket of his shorts. Later, on his way home, he stopped at the pedestrian crossing, waiting for the lights to change. A girl standing next to him eyed the large bulge in his shorts. "What's that?" she asked, her eyes gleaming with lust. "Tennis ball," came the breathless reply. "Oh," said the girl sympathetically, "that must be painful. I had tennis elbow once."

One More Beer

Text Msg to Wife: "I'm having just one more beer with guys after golf. If I'm not home in an hour, read this message again.” 

Mallard Tricks

Q: Why are mallards good at dodge ball?
A: They can duck.