New Scientific Element : MAN

• Element Name: MAN
• Symbol: XY
• Atomic Weight: (180 +/- 50)
• Physical properties: Solid at room temperature, but gets bent out of shape easily. Fairly dense and sometimes flaky. Difficult to find a pure sample. Due to rust, aging.
• Samples are unable to conduct electricity as easily as young samples.
• Chemical properties: Attempts to bond with WO any chance it can get. Also tends to form strong bonds with itself. Becomes explosive when mixed with Kd (Element: Child) for prolonged period of time. Neutralized by dousing with alcohol.
• Usage: None known. Possibly good methane source. Good samples are able to produce large quantities on command.
• Caution: In the absence of WO, this element rapidly decomposes and begins to smell.

Mountain Men and Loose Women

Two old friends from the mountains ran into each other at the local bar. One said, "Heard ya went to the big city Jeb." His friend replied, "Yep. Even tried me out one of those 'loose women' ya always hear about." "You don't say."  said the first man. "Bet that was costly." "Nope." Jeb smirked. "Kinfolk." 

Lost Chapter In GENESIS....

Adam was walking around the garden of Eden feeling very lonely, so God asked him, "What is wrong with you?" Adam said he didn't have anyone to talk to.
God said that He was going to make Adam a companion and that it would be a woman. He said, "This person will gather food for you, cook for you, and when you discover clothing she'll wash it for you. She will always agree with every decision you make. She will bear your children and never ask you to get up in the middle of the night to take care of them. She will not nag you and will always be the first to admit she was wrong when you've had a disagreement. She will never have a headache and will freely give you love and passion whenever you need it."
Adam asked God, "What will a woman like this cost?"
God replied, "An arm and a leg."
Then Adam asked, "What can I get for a rib?" The rest is history...