Sex Jokes - Booty Call Jokes

A policeman was patrolling near midnight at a local parking spot overlooking a golf course. He drove by a car and saw a couple inside with the dome light on. Inside there was a young man in the driver's seat reading a computer magazine and a young lady in the back seat calmly knitting. He stopped to investigate. He walked up to the driver's window and knocked. The young man looked up, obligingly cranked the window down, and said, "Yes, Officer?" "What are you doing?" the policeman asked. "What does it look like?" answered the young man. "I'm reading this magazine." Pointing towards the young lady in the back seat, the officer then asked, "And what is she doing?" The young man looked over his shoulder and replied, "I think she's knitting a sweater." Confused, the officer asked, "How old are you, young man?" "I'm nineteen," he replied. "And how old is she?" asked the officer. The young man looked at his watch and said, "Well, in about twelve minutes she'll be eighteen."

Q: What should you do if your girlfriend starts smoking?

A: Slow down and use a lubricant.

Q: What's the best way to make yourself last with your girlfriend?

A: Let everyone go first!

A man who worked for a fire company came home from work one day and told his wife, "You know, we have a wonderful system at the fire station. Bell 1 rings and we put on our jackets. Bell 2 rings and we slide down the pole. Bell 3 rings and we're on the trucks ready to go. From now on we're going to run this house the same way. When I say bell 1, I want you to strip naked. When I say bell 2, I want you to jump into bed. When I say bell 3, we're going to screw all night.

The next night he came home from work and yelled, "Bell 1," and his wife took off all here clothes. "Bell 2," and his wife jumped into bed. "Bell 3," and they began to screw.

After 2 minutes his wife yelled, "Bell 4."

"What's this Bell 4?" asked her husband.

"More hose," she replied, "You're nowhere near the fire!"

Q: Whats the most embarrassing thing for a cheerleader?

A: When she does the splits and 8 class rings fall out!