Switzerland Perks

Q: What are some of the perks of living in Switzerland?
A: Well, the flag's a big plus.

Up A Tree

A little girl was playing up a tree near a church. The priest was taking a walk when he happened to look up the tree and saw the little girl. She had no panties on, so he called her down and gave her money to buy a pair of panties. The girl was so happy and told her mommy about it. The next day, when the priest was taking his daily walk, he looked up the same tree and saw the young girl's mother up there. She had no panties on, so he called her down, gave her two dollars and told her to buy a razor.

Ant be Gone

Q: What did the Ant boss say to the Ant worker?
A: Sorry, but we have to let you go. I've been getting reports you haven't been pulling 100 times your weight.