Religion Jokes - Muslim Jokes

Wailing Wall

A reporter goes to Israel to cover the fighting. She is looking for something emotional and positive and of human interest. Something like that guy in Sarajevo who risked his life to play the cello everyday in the town square. In Jerusalem, she heard about an old Jew who had been going to the to pray, twice a day, every day, for a long, long time. So she went to check it out. She goes to the and there he is! She watches him pray and after about 45 minutes, when he turns to leave, she approaches him for an interview. "Rebecca Smith, CNN News. Sir, how long have you been coming to the and praying?" "For about 50 years." "What do you pray for?" "For peace between the Jews and the Arabs. For all the hatred to stop. For all of our children to grow up in safety and friendship." "How do you feel after doing this for 50 years?" "Like I'm talking to a fucking wall."

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Anonymous

Religion Sampler

So I went to a mixed religion convention. The Christian Priest came, laid his hands on my hand and said, “By the will of Jesus Christ, you will walk today!” I smiled and told him I was not paralysed. The Rabbi came, laid his hands on my hand and said, “By the will of God Almighty, you will walk today! I was less amused when I told him there was nothing wrong with me. The Mullah came, took my hands and said, “Insha Allah, you will walk today!” I snapped at him, “There’s nothing wrong with me” The Buddhist Monk came, held my hands and said, “By the will of The Great Buddha, you will walk today!” I rudely told him there was nothing wrong with me.
After the sermons, I stepped outside and found my car had been stolen.

Anonymous

Predator

Q: Why did the Muslim man go into the elementary school?
A: To pick up his wives

Anonymous