Religion Jokes - God Jokes

Lost Chapter In GENESIS....

Adam was walking around the garden of Eden feeling very lonely, so God asked him, "What is wrong with you?" Adam said he didn't have anyone to talk to.
God said that He was going to make Adam a companion and that it would be a woman. He said, "This person will gather food for you, cook for you, and when you discover clothing she'll wash it for you. She will always agree with every decision you make. She will bear your children and never ask you to get up in the middle of the night to take care of them. She will not nag you and will always be the first to admit she was wrong when you've had a disagreement. She will never have a headache and will freely give you love and passion whenever you need it."
Adam asked God, "What will a woman like this cost?"
God replied, "An arm and a leg."
Then Adam asked, "What can I get for a rib?" The rest is history...

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Anonymous

A Really Good Picture of God

A youngster devoted an entire rainy indoors afternoon to a drawing he was doing with varicolored crayons. His mother finally looked over his shoulder, and, puzzled, asked "Who's that you're drawing, son?"  The son answered, "God."  "Don't be silly," reproved the mother. "Nobody knows what God looks like."  Not even pausing in his task, the son announced calmly ,"They will when I'm finished!"

Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

Guy Has 3 Questions in Heaven

This fellow dies and goes to heaven. God offers to answer three questions. Guy: "Why are girls so pretty?" God: "So you'll like them." Guy: "Why are girls soft?" God: "So you'll like them." Guy: "Why are girls so dumb?" God: "So they'll like you."

Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous