Priest Meat

Q: What kind of meat do Priests eat on Friday?
A: Nun!

More Cool Bumper Stickers

• I don't suffer from insanity. I enjoy every minute of it.
• There's too much blood in my alcohol system.
• WANTED: Meaningful overnight relationship.
• You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me.
• I'm not a complete idiot. Some parts are missing.
• Jesus paid for our sins... now lets get our money's worth.
• Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.
• Prevent inbreeding: ban Country & Western music.
• Sometimes I wake up grumpy; other times I let her sleep.
• Lord save me from your followers.
• God must love stupid people. He made so many.
• I said "no" to drugs, but they just wouldn't listen.
• Rainy days and automatic weapons always get me down.
• I took an IQ test and the results were negative.

Kid's Letters to God

Some cute letters kids have written to God:

Dear GOD: Instead of letting people die and having to make new ones, why don't You just keep the ones You have? - Jane
Dear GOD:  Maybe Cain and Abel would not kill each other so much if they had their own rooms. It works with my brother. - Larry
Dear GOD:  If You watch me in church on Sunday, I'll show You my new shoes. - Mickey
Dear GOD:  I bet it is very hard for You to love all of everybody in the whole world. There are only 4 people in our family and I can never do it. - Nan
Dear GOD:  In school they told us what You do. Who does it when You are on vacation? - Jane
Dear GOD:  I read the Bible. What does "beget" mean? Nobody will tell me. - Love, Alison
Dear GOD:  Are You really invisible or is it just a trick? - Lucy
Dear GOD:  Is it true my father won't get in Heaven if he uses his bowling words in the house? Anita
Dear GOD:  Did You mean for the giraffe to look like that or was it an accident? -Norma
Dear GOD:  Who draws the lines around the countries? - Nan
Dear GOD:  I went to this wedding and they kissed right in church. Is that okay? -Neil
Dear GOD:  What does it mean You are a Jealous God? I thought You had everything. -Jane
Dear GOD:  Did You really mean "do unto others as they do unto you"? Because if You did, then I'm going to fix my brother. - Darla
Dear GOD:  Thank you for the baby brother, but what I prayed for was a puppy. - Joyce
Dear GOD:It rained for our whole vacation and is my father mad! He said some things about You that people are not supposed to say, but I hope You will not hurt him anyway. Your friend, (But I am not going to tell You who I am)
Dear GOD:  Why is Sunday school on Sunday? I thought it was supposed to be our day of rest. Tom L.
Dear GOD:  Please send me a pony. I never asked for anything before. You can look it up. Bruce
Dear GOD:  If we come back as something else, please don't let me be MaryHorton - because I hate her. - Denise
Dear GOD:  If you give me a genie like Aladdin, I will give You anything You want, except my money or my chess set. - Raphael
Dear GOD:  I want to be just like my Daddy when I get big but not with so much hair all over. - Sam
Dear GOD:  You don't have to worry about me. I always look both ways. - Dean
Dear GOD:  I think the stapler is one of your greatest inventions. Ruth M.
Dear GOD:  I think about You sometimes even when I'm not praying - Elliott
Dear GOD:  Of all the people who work for You I like Noah and David the best.- Rob
Dear GOD:  My brother told me about being born but it doesn't sound right. They're just kidding, aren't they? - Marsha
Dear GOD:  I would like to live 900 years like the guy in the Bible. - Love, Chris
Dear GOD:  We read Thomas Edison made light. But in Sunday school they said You did it So I bet he stole your idea. - Sincerely, Donna
Dear GOD:  The bad people laughed at Noah - "You made an ark on dry land, you fool." But he was smart, he stuck with You. That's what I would do. - Eddie
Dear GOD:  I do not think anybody could be a better GOD. Well, I just want You to know but I am not just saying that because You are GOD already. - Charles 
Dear GOD:  I didn't think orange went with purple until I saw the sunset You made on Tuesday. That was cool. - Eugene