Relationship Jokes - Woman Criticizes Man

Black Widow Spiders

Q: Why do female black widow spiders kill the male after mating?
A: To stop the snoring before it starts.

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Anonymous

Nothing But The Truth

A married man was having an affair with his secretary. One day, their passions overcame them and they took off for her house, where they made passionate love all afternoon. Exhausted from the wild sex, they fell asleep, awakening around 8.00 p.m. As the man threw on his clothes, he told the woman to take his shoes outside and rub them through the grass and dirt. Mystified, she nonetheless complied. He slipped into his shoes and drove home. Where have you been!" demanded his wife when he entered the house. "Darling, I can't lie to you. I've been having an affair with my secretary, and we've been having sex all afternoon. I fell asleep and didn't wake up until 8.00 p.m." The wife glanced down at his shoes and said, "You lying bastard! You've been playing golf!!"

Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

The Good Wife Fetches All

Gena is such a good wife. Why, when her husband gets home late at night, as soon as he enters the door, he gets his pipe, slippers, pajamas, robe, book, and dinner.  And, if anything else is handy, she heaves that at him, too!

Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous