Redneck Jokes - You Might Be a Redneck

You Might Be A Redneck...

You might be a redneck if...

  • Your soap on a rope doubles as an air freshener.
  • Your wife's hairdo attracts bees.
  • Your baby's first words are "Attention K-Mart shoppers."
  • The antenna on your truck is a danger to low flying airplanes.
  • Your primary source of income is the pawn shop.
  • You pick your teeth from a catalog.
  • You've ever financed a tattoo.
  • You refer to the time you won a free case of oil as the "day my ship came in."
  • Your hairdo has ever been ruined by a ceiling fan.
  • Your mother has been involved in a fist fight at a high school sports event.

Categories: Redneck Jokes (You Might Be a Redneck)
Anonymous

You Might Be A Redneck 53

You might be a redneck if...

  • You think you are an entrepreneur because of the "Dirt for Sale" sign in the front yard.
  • You're still scalping tickets after the concert is over.
  • You don't think Jeff's jokes are funny.
  • Your house has a kickstand.
  • You drive around a parking lot for fun.
  • Your girlfriend has ever called YOUR parents "Ma and Pa".
  • You have to duct tape your gloves on.
  • You've ever pruned your trees with a shotgun.
  • Someone says they spotted Bigfoot and you go buy tickets to the tractor pull.
  • You think that Marlboro is a cologne.

Categories: Redneck Jokes (You Might Be a Redneck) , Jokes about Families (Father Jokes) , Jokes about Families (Mother Jokes) , Relationship Jokes (Dating Jokes) , Relationship Jokes (Man Criticizes Woman)
Anonymous

You Might Be A Redneck 56

You might be a redneck if...

  • The neighborhood dogs are afraid to come around your house because the fowl are big enough to hurt them.
  • You have ever had to climb up on the roof of an out building to get down any fowl that was frozen to the roof.
  • You have ever worried more about the outbuildings freezing than your vehicles.
  • You have ever had deer graze in your front yard close enough to the house that you could throw a rock and hit them.
  • You have ever dug up your driveway to fix your water line.
  • You have ever had to get up quickly in the morning in order to let the goat out before she dropped raisins on the kitchen floor.
  • Your wife is the only one that the geese will allow into the laundry room.
  • Any of your children learned to make very realistic animal noises before they learned to talk.
  • You have to stop a leak in your flat-bottom boat with gum and chewing tobacco.
  • You have to pay your hair care professional in weekly installments of $3.00.

Categories: Redneck Jokes (You Might Be a Redneck) , Money Jokes (Poor People Jokes) , Animal Jokes
Anonymous