Taking A Bath
You know you're a redneck if your wife wants to take a bath but you have to move the transmission from the tub first.
You Might Be a Redneck 44
Your vehicle has a two-tone paint job, primer red and primer gray.
The tobacco chewers in your family aren't just men.
Your mom calls you over to help, cause she has a flat tire on her house.
The ASPCA raids your kitchen.
You have to check in the bottom of your shoe for change so you can get Grandma a new plug of tobacco.
You can't get married to your sweetheart because there is a law against it.
You celebrate Groundhog Day because you believe in it.
Your kid takes a siphon hose to show-and-tell.
You've been on TV more than 5 times describing the sound of a tornado.
Star Spangled Banner
You might be a redneck if you think the last words to The Star Spangled Banner are "Gentlemen, start your engines."
Redneck Dating Practice
You might be a redneck if you go to your family reunion to meet women!
You Might Be a Redneck If... Always More
You might be a redneck if...
- Taking a dip has nothing to do with water.
- There are more than ten lawsuits currently pending against your dog.
- You take a fishing pole to Sea World.
- The hood and one door are a different color from the rest of your car.
- You've ever filled your deer tag on the golf course.
- You've ever shot somebody over a mall parking space.
- Santa Claus refuses to let your kids sit in his lap.
- Your toilet paper has page numbers on it.
- You think mud rasslin' should be an Olympic sport.
- The receptionist checks the rat traps at your place of business.