Mother Duck

Q: What did did the mother duck say to the little duck.
A: If you don't behave, I'm gonna quack you one.

Indian Om Tone

(Strong east Indian accent:) Hello, you have reached the existential hotline of Ransheesh. I am currently meditating, but if you leave your name and which lifeline you are currently inhabiting at the sound of the Om, I will send good karma waves and contact you when the stars align properly.

Playing Tabla

Once a couple were on vacation. The husband was lying on the beach facing downwards on his stomach & the wife was patting him on his butt. He asked her what she was doing, she said "I`m playing the Tabla" He turned around & told her "Alright now you can start playing the flute."