Q: Why do black people hate country music?
A: Because when they hear the word 'hoedown' they think their sister got shot!
A six year old comes crying to his Mother because his little sister pulled his hair. "Don't be angry," the Mother says, "Your little sister doesn't realize that pulling hair hurts." A short while later, there's more crying, and the Mother goes to investigate. This time the sister is bawling and her brother says... "Now she knows."
Sisters Growing Old
Once upon a time there were three sisters, ages 92, 94 and 96, and they all lived together. One night the 96 year old ran a bath. She put one foot in and paused. "Was I getting in the tub or out?" she yelled. The 94 year old hollered back, "I don't know. I'll come and see." She started up the stairs and stopped. She shouted, "Was I going up or coming down?" The 92 year old sitting at the kitchen table having tea, listening to her sisters, she shook her head and said, "I sure hope I never get that forgetful," and knocked on wood for good measure. Then she yelled, "I'll come up and help both of you as soon as I see who's at the door."
My friend told me he was shagging his girlfriend's twin.
I said: "You lucky thing! But how do you tell them apart?"
"Oh that's easy," he said, "Her brother has a mustache."
Have you heard about the latest sensation? It's called "Rodeo Sex". That's when you mount your wife doggy style and in the middle of the act you whisper in her ear, "Your sister has a tighter pussy than you", then try to hold on for 8 seconds!