Disease / Afflictions Jokes - STD Jokes

Researchers say they've discovered a tree extract that could help to prevent herpes... Must be a rubber tree...

A man walks in to a doctors office and says, "Doctor you must help me. I have AIDS."  The doctor replies, "Are you gay?" The man truthfully answers "yes." The doctor says, "I think I can help. Go to the grocery store, buy a box of laxatives and a quart of prune juice.  Take ALL of the laxatives and drink ALL of the prune juice. Take a nap for a couple of hours.  When you wake up your problem will be solved." The man answers, "Will that cure my AIDS?" The doctor replies, "No, but you will find out what your ass hole is really for!"

Q: What's green and eats nuts?

A: Syphilis.

Yo mama so nasty, her crabs use her tampon string as a getaway rope.

There were two little crabs who met in Florida every year. One year when they arrived, one little crab was shivering terribly. The other crab asked why and he said, "I got a ride here on a man's mustache. He drove so fast, I was freezing."
"Well," the other crab said, "why don't you hide up a lady's skirt next year. Then you won't be as cold." The little crab said, "Hey, that isn't a bad idea." A year later, the two crabs met at the same place, and the one little crab was shivering very badly again. The other crab asked if he had taken his advice and he said, "Yeah, I went and hid up a lady's skirt, but when I woke up in the morning I was on that's guy's mustache again!"