There's more money being spent on breast implants and Viagra today than on Alzheimer's research. This means that by 2040 there should be a large elderly population with perky boobs, huge erections and absolutely no recollection of what to do with them.
I Have Bad News
The doctor tells his patient: "Well I have good news and bad news..." The patient says, "Lay it on me Doc. What's the bad news?" "You have Alzheimer's disease." "Good heavens! What's the good news?" "You can go home and forget about it!"
Patient: "Doctor, I have a serious memory problem. I can't remember anything!"
Doctor: "Since when did you have this problem?"
Patient: "What problem?
Doctor: "Did you take those pills I gave you to improve your memory?"
Patient: "What pills?"
A guy walks into his doctor and says, "Doc, you gotta help me, I can't remember anything!" The doc asks, "How long have you had this problem?" The guy says, "What problem?"
Bad News First
"Okay doctor, give me the bad news first." "You've got AIDS." "Oh, no! What could be worse than that?" "You've also got Alzheimer's Disease." "Oh. Well, that's not so bad. At least I don't have AIDS."