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The best jokes and joke writers!

Blonde Lifeguard

A blonde is working as a lifeguard at a swimming pool when a girl begins to drown, screaming "lifesaver! lifesaver!" The blonde thinks for a moment, and then asks "cherry or grape?"

Just Fake It

A violist and a cellist were standing on a sinking ship together. "Help!" cried the cellist, "I can't swim!" "Don't worry," said the violist, "just fake it."

Polish Burial At Sea

Did you hear about the Polish Admiral who wanted to be buried at sea when he died? Five sailors died digging his grave.

Drown a Blonde

Q: How do you drown a blonde?

A: Put a scratch and sniff sticker on the bottom of a pool.