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The best jokes and joke writers!

Dangerous Fish

Q: What do you call a dangerous fish who drinks too much?

A: A beer-a-cuda!

Shark Week - Road

Q: Why did the shark cross the road?

A: To get to the other tide.

Shark Week - January Jones

January Jones was walking on the beach one day and saw a shark swimming around a man. The man was screaming, "Help me! Help me!" January laughed and laughed! She knew that the shark was never going to help that man!

Ponderings Collection 34

  • Whose cruel idea was it for the word "lisp" to have an "s" in it?
  • Since light travels faster than sound, isn't that why some people appear bright until you hear them speak?
  • How come abbreviated is such a long word?
  • If it's zero degrees outside today and it's supposed to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold is it going to be?
  • Since Americans throw rice at weddings, do Asians throw hamburgers?
  • Why are they called apartments, when they're all stuck together?
  • Why do banks charge you a "non-sufficient funds fee" on money they already know you don't have?
  • If a tree falls in the forest and no one is around to see it, do the other trees make fun of it?
  • When two airplanes almost collide why do they call it a near miss? It sounds like a near hit to me!
  • Do fish get cramps after eating?

Heavenly Fish

Q: Which fish go to heaven when they die?

A: Angelfish!