A zebra dies and goes to heaven. When checking in, he tells St. Peter, "Say, I have always wanted to know if I am white with black stripes or black with white stripes."
St. Peter, "I can't answer that question... but see God walking around over there? Ask him."
Zebra goes to God, "God, am I white with black stripes or black with white stripes?"
God looks at the zebra sagely and states, "You are what you are."
Frustrated, the zebra returns to St. Peter. "What did He say?" asks St. Peter.
"Oh," replies the zebra. "He just said, 'You are what you are,' and I still don't know whether I'm black with white stripes or white with black stripes."
"Oh, that's easy," says St. Peter. "You are white with black stripes."
"How do you know?" asks the zebra. "Well," says St. Peter, "if you were black with white stripes he would have said 'you is what you is.'"
Q: What do you get when you cross a black cat with a lemon?
A: A sour puss.
Q: Why did the cow cross the road?
A: To get to the udder side!
Men And Cats
Q: How are a husband and a cat similar when it comes to housework?
A: They both hide when they see the vacuum cleaner.
Q: What do you get if you cross a Collie with a rose?
A: A collie-flower!