Airplane Jokes

Bag Surprise

I'll never forget the time I had to use an oxygen mask for an Delta flight.

It was just after the agent told me how much the checked baggage fees were.

Categories: Airplane Jokes (Luggage Jokes) , Funny Thoughts , One-Liner Jokes
Anonymous

Polish Airplane Boom

A Polish man was taking a flight on a commercial airliner. The airliner had 4 engines, which is quite normal. About an hour into the flight, a loud BOOM occurred. The flight attendant came over the intercom and said, "Ladies and gentlemen, we have blown an engine, but there is no need to worry. We still have three engines, I repeat, we still have three engines." Everyone stayed calm. About another hour later, another boom. The flight attendant comes over the intercom. "Ladies and gentlemen, we have blown another engine, but there is no need to worry! We still have two more engines to go!" The people stayed calm. An hour later, the same situation. Now only one engine remained. Then, the Polish man stood up and said out loud, "Man! If this keeps up, we could be up here all day!"

Categories: Airplane Jokes (Crash Jokes) , Ethnic / Country Jokes (Polish Jokes)
Anonymous

Bragging

A Frenchman and an Italian were seated next to an American on an overseas flight. After a few cocktails, the men began discussing their home lives. "Last night I made love to my wife four times," the Frenchman bragged, "And this morning she made me delicious crepes and she told me how much she adored me."
"Ah, last night I made love to my wife six times," the Italian responded, "And this morning she made me a wonderful omelet and told me she could never love another man."
When the American remained silent, the Frenchman smugly asked, "And how many times did you make love to your wife last night?"
"Once," he replied.
"Only once?" the Italian arrogantly snorted. "And what did she say to you this morning?"
"Don't stop."

Categories: Sex Jokes , Relationship Jokes (Marriage Jokes) , Ethnic / Country Jokes (Irish Jokes) , Ethnic / Country Jokes (Italian Jokes) , Ethnic / Country Jokes (American Jokes) , Airplane Jokes
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Anonymous