Horse Lover

A worried patient went to his psychiatrist. "I'm in love with my horse," he said .
"But that's nothing," replied the shrink. "A lot of people love animals. For instance, my wife and I have a dog that we love very much."
"Ah, but doctor," the patient replied. "It's a sexual attraction that I feel toward my horse."
"Ahhh!" exclaimed the doc. "What kind of a horse is it? Male or female?"
"Female, of course," said the bloke. "What do you think I am, a faggot!"

Psychiatrist Definitions

Psychiatrist:

1. Mind-sweeper.
2. Someone who asks a lot of expensive questions your wife asks for nothing.

Psychiatry: The care of the id by the odd.

Pervert?

A patient goes to a psychiatrist. The psychiatrist gives him a Rorschach Test; he shows the patient a circle with a dot inside it and asks, "What do you see?" The patient replies, "Two people are having sex in the middle of a circular room." The psychiatrist shows the patient another picture of a square with a dot inside it and asks, "What do you see?" Patient answers, "Two people are having sex in a square room." The psychiatrist shows the patient one more picture of a triangle with a dot outside it and asks, "What do you see now?" Patient replies, "Doctor, are you some kind of pervert?!?"