Profession Jokes

Problems During Flight

The following is supposedly a true story. To be included, besides being true, the story is most likely strange, weird, surprising, or funny.
On a recent flight, an elderly passenger kept peering out the window. Since it was totally dark, all she could see was the blinking wing-tip light. Finally, she rang for the flight attendant. "I'm sorry to bother you," she said, "but I think you should inform the pilot that his left-turn indicator is on and has been for some time."

Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

The Dentist

A dentist starts talking to a girl at a bar. They get along so well that they decide to go to the girl's place. A few drinks later, the guy takes off his shirt and then washes his hands. He then takes off his trousers and again washes his hands. The girl has been watching him and says, "You must be a dentist." The guy, surprised, says, "Yes .... How did you figure that out?"
"Easy," she replies. "You keep washing your hands." One thing leads to another and they make love. After it's over the girl says, "You must be a really good dentist." The guy, now with an inflated ego, says, "Sure - I'm a good dentist. How did you figure that out?"
The girl replies...."I didn't feel a thing."

Anonymous

Here's Little Johnny!

A teacher in New York City wanted to see how many animals the city kids in her fourth-grade class could identify. She drew a picture of a cow on the blackboard and said, "Who can tell me what this is?" A little girl raised her hand. "Yes, Janie, what do you think it is?" "It's a cow, teacher." "Very good, Janie," said the teacher. Then she drew a picture of a pig, and a little boy answered correctly. She drew several other barnyard animals and was unable to stump the class. Finally, she decided to try something a little more difficult. She drew a stag with a large spread of antlers. The kids just stared, but nobody offered an answer. "I'll give you a hint," said the teacher. "What does your mommy call your daddy when she's trying to be 'lovey-dovey'?" Instantly, little Johnny raised his hand and said,  "Ooh, ooh!, I know, Teacher. It's a big horny bastard!"

Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous