The Plan

"First," said the playboy, "I'm going to buy you a few drinks and get you a bit loose." "Oh no you're not," said the girl. "Then I'll take you to dinner and ply you with a few more drinks." "Oh no you're not." "Then I'll take you to my place and keep serving you drinks." "Oh no you're not." "Then I'm going to make violent, passionate love to you." "Oh no you're not." "And I'm not going to wear a condom either!" said the guy ."Oh yes you are!" said the girl.

With Relish And Onions

Q: What's white on the outside, green on the inside and comes with relish and onions?
A: A hot frog!

Major Seventh

Q: What is the definition of a major seventh?
A: A violist playing octaves.